hello from bangkok! (: i found a computer! (: i'm a happy kid. man, i just read another one of april joy rodriguez's blog posts. it still upsets me! ITS NOT FAIR!! /:

anyway i'm at this restaurant called cabbages&condoms. how cute huh? i just had a great massage too. and i'm going to get to ride a tuktuk later. oh and i rode an orange cab earlier. (: shit, i'm damn suaku la. matthew lee, if you're readin this, they don't have your thing on board. sorry.

i'm looking around and there are condoms EVERYWHERE! there are these mannequins that are wearing condoms as clothing, like layers and layers of condoms. they have handicraft made out of condoms too, rugs, bags, necklaces. and instead of mints they hand out free condoms! (: i'm super fascinated.

i guess the food's here. will blog more when i get back tomorrow i guess. (:

ps. jaclyn, remember at cine when i saw the bling with the lock and key and you saw an owl that you like? well the guy LIED to us. i found them here, i got it for you! (:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

funny shit, made amos and me laugh like crazy people. [singing] i'm a happy girl! (: i'm going to bangkok tomorrow early in the morning. i hope i can fix up a cam to bring there by tonight . /:

mummy! stop scolding me la. everything you also want to scold. ): i packed my room and all, why still scold?? grr. better go and appease her. /:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

first of all, HAPPY belated BIRTHDAY FAUSSI. (: i'm so sorry i forgot. i haven't spoken to you for the longest time!

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

fuad, this is for you. not exactly for you, more for me, but you wanted vids right? haha.
woke up to megan half sitting on my tummy, her face in front of mine. yea, it was fun with her around. it was fun talking to xiao-yi as well. (: yes, mummy's still treating me like a 12 year old. i guess i have to live with that for awhile? hmm.

went over to sam's house this morning. bought two heels. haha and to sam's post, yes dear, i so totally love you! sitting for dawn. she needs someone on sunday but i cannot make it. /: jaclyn, HELP?

i was watching extreme makeover, and for the first time, the girl is so not pretty after! like everyone theought her jaw area will looks so nice because that was the main thing they were focusing on. it looked alot different, but doesn't make her look pretty leh. /: her body's hot though, after the workouts and diets.

now its simple life. i think the show's entertaining. (: especially this one when the two of them are suppoed to take care of kids. one of the boys shitted when paris was in the bathtub with him. funny stuff. (:

i need the rigourous training too. but i think i will just die before i see any results back la.

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

yes, like crap, what are you going to do about it?

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

old times! grr. i'm starting to feel it now, all of it. every, single f*cking piece of crap there could ever have been. mum, i've had enough with the stuff going around, i've had enough coming from other places, i don't need your threats and orders. i cannot stand those. it won't work, you know it, threatening me. you've tried it coutless times. fine, its getting to me, alright? but it won't work, i promise you that. no crap text messages this time, or i will seriously crack.

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

i miss spending time away from home. (: hmm, at home is cool too, i guess, but always REALLY boring. good news is, I AM GOING TO BANGKOK! yes, call me suaku, but i've never been to bangkok, ever, and i'm soooo excited! i just need a camera man. i don't know if godma is coming with us. ): ohwells. shopping! (:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

piggyback rides. (:

i don't know what is happening to me. it feels like when i was studying, i feel so lethargic, so tired, so lazy.

went to paragon early in the morning to remove my stiches. i guess its fine now. i still don't really dare to chew on that side though. but its supposed to be recovering very quickly from here on. (: walked around town area for quite awhile, then met jaclyn, chester and glenn for a movie. gridiron gang. i didn't hear about it before i watched it, but it was good. its like the longest yard, with teens. only after the movie i started seeing ads for the movie.

walked around town some more with jaclyn before going home. i have been watching the new tv! i love it. no more having to leave the comfy sofa, no more having to watch green faces and red clothing, no more having to wait 20mins after the tv is turned on before the pictures come on. it is a really great feeling.

i watched an interesting thingie on central, about sharks and how they attack. now its survivor. carina, fine, ozzy is cute. (:

jaclyn, all the best with the camera problem. /:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

View Show Create Your Own


back from chalet! pictures are in. (: today with sam and jaclyn, np open house, pool with glenn, chester and ian. you got it, i'm lazy tonight. /:

sam, i hope you're okay, call me if you need anything. love you!

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

i didn't think i'd be blogging for the whole four or three chalet days, but i'm not in the chalet. i'm going back, but majority of the people left today. i'm at nicholas's place now, with jaclyn. watching some scary movie.

but i guess the chalet was quite fun. we spent the first night barbecueing and walking around the changi area. i went down so many times, all with different people. saw those transvestites and drunken han was making some pretty rude comments about them, really loudy, glenn, charles and i were quite afraid to be walking with him. and he puked quite a number of times too. /:

oh i got sort of got drunk too. i didn't drink alot, but they're saying its most probably because i mixed my drinks, i felt terrible after! okay, maybe i wasn't drunk, but i almost passed out. nicholas had to tak a bus back with me to the chalet because i couldn't walk. i couldn't even shower properly. it was pretty bad and i felt kind of pathetic. i am so not drinking like that ever again. i haven't even drunk since that first night.

sam realised her potential of becoming a beautician. she tried to colour jaclyn's hair and it turned out pretty well. the colour's not obvious, but its nice when you can see it. tonight we girls will have the entire house to ourselves, all two levels, two bedrooms, two toilets to ourselves. haha.

i miss my comp though. (: so i got to thank nicholas for this man.

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

everything's too overwhelming for me. i need help.

i followed my parents to TOC today, for an actual service, since last time i went was the musical drama thing. (: they were all so nice and stuff and i got invited to join them next sat but there's a np thing which won't end on time. thing is, i have no idea where i'm supposed to be now. i'm being thrown all over the place and its really hard for me to make this kind of decision by myself.

chalet's tomorrow, and although we girls have quite a fair bimbotic bit planned for ourselves, (: there's still some stuffs i haven't settled. i should have freaking packed the stuff needed for bbq first and let daddy send it there and leave my personal stuffs for later. grr, my time management is still equally lousy. so tomorrow on top of carrying my bag i still got to carry a seperate bad with all the stuff we need for bbq. the food's settled for now i suppose.

oh there was an anonymous text i got earlier, most probably from a stranger. damn, i'm spooked. how the hell did he get my number? and i'm pretty sure its a he too. some freaking malay shit. he asked me if i understood malay and his english was terrible. argh.

i thought i still had loads of shit to put here. but i can't think of anymore now. these things come to me at the weirdest times. /:

oh and when i get the pictures from fusion and darren's farewell i'll post them la.

darren, have a good time there! we'll miss you, but bring a babe back. (:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

the blogger problem is completely dampening my blogging mood. ): but i guess i'm going to be away from the computer for about a week, hopefully that will get me off my computer/ivan addiction/obsession. i'm looking forward to the chalet i guess. the girls aren't going. i hope all goes well la.

i bought a new adidas bag. (: on impulse. gosh, there goes my hard earned money. i still owe amos his christmas present, but he owes me 20bucks! oh, there's this big tree that was growing beside my block, and it fell down! i remember when saiful and i were talking about creating a story whereby a fridge fell down, and we were laughing our asses off at that. now that the big tree fell down, it doesn't seem so funny afterall. hmm.

the stupid tree caused stupid jams up to i have no idea where, but it was crazy. it was uprooted, the tree, and it fell on another smaller tree, ripping it out of the ground too. and the two poor trees had to be cut up into many small pieces and shoved to the side of the road. i guess that spot isn't fated to have big trees there? something happened to the first big tree there as well. /:

sam! i need help with money for pohpiah man, its too much for me to handle. ): also, is there any way we can not fight for tv time on monday? haha.

to continue with ivan obsession, this is his audition video. he looks a little dorky, but still the cute ivan he is. (:



new song of the moment! its been top of the charts for a couple of weeks?
song of last moment:
ordinary miracle; sarah mclachlan

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

blogger's so absolutely screwed up its driving me nuts. is there such a thing as a full blog? like if i take some of the vids and/or pics off my blog will it allow me to put more up? but then again if that's the case what about people who have entire blogs dedicated to videos? won't they run out of space quickly too, if there even if a blog space thingie.

well, whatever. i'm just going to wait it out and "see how".

carina, i highly doubt you're going to see this, but i am so terribly sorry that our timings clash. it sucks that you've got school too and i can't always accomodate to your timing. but there's that something else you were talking about. anyway, i hope it all works out for you. if there's anything to do with the guys i just might be able to help you. love you always!

ps, if anyone can help me with this blogger shit, text me or something!

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

rahh, i can't post anything!! /: meaning pictures and videos. grr.

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

the song for the eyeliner dance kept playing itself in my head today, especially the line the takeover, the sweeping INSENSITIVITY, of this.

shit i think i'm going crazy again. must be under the influence of 4bee'o6. quite a few of us met up in school today. the guys played soccer for awhile, for a damn long while. (: sam and i went over to acsi for awhile, completely forgetting our ezlink cards were with the security guard until we were on the bus. how embarassing. /: by the way, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAYE! and thankyou yuliang for sponsoring our bus fares.

followed new and han to play pool. and yes, i still can't play for nuts. i didn't even dare to try with them around. went to dawn's place after. jaclyn, this is weird, natalie asked for you. "where's jaclyn jie jie with the short hair? is she coming back?" and "is it tomorrow you come will be two of you not only one?" haha. i also have a couple of recordings of natalie singing nursery rhymes, only because kimberley refused to sing for me. and she's at her "why" stage in life. uh oh.

my entire left cheek is throbbing with pain. i have a pulse in my gums. /: i need some pity or something like it. gosh.

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

yawn. i was up at 8! spent an entire hour in the shower. feels good. (: last night was kind of a role reversal scenario, where instead of me calling people in the middle of the night (cos i didn't know they were sleeping), i had two late night phone calls. i cannot remember what i mumbled to the callers though, at all. /: i hope i didn't say anything mean.i remember thinking one of them was my uncle james, for some reason. haha.

i love you too, sam! (: and ivan's not 'hmmm' la please. he's too cute to deserve just a hmm. (:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

i am going to resist the urge to post more videos here. the area's too crowded. i'm just going to go halfway and post some links. i mean, most of it is for my own viewing pleaure, so i can watch these videos over and over again until i throw up. ivan and allison are sooo sweet together. (:
an ivan and allison montage
another ivan and allison montage.

the amos incident, i shall handle it just like i'm handling my videos addiction, i shall meet whatever it is halfway. i am going to resist the urge to smack him in the face, but am going to purposely spite him. i realise fuad is the only one who knows about this, and i'm too tired to type it all out. anyway, to cut a long story short, amos wants my calculator and i can't find it to give it to him, and i'm not even going to try.

hmm i think i have a busy day ahead of me tomorrow, considering i have to sit till 10.30pm. and neither dawn or her husband is going to be home, this is only the second time i've been left completely alone with the kids. (;

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

who doesn't think wade robson is a genius? (: to tell you the truth, i only heard about him when ivan danced solos to his songs. and he was a choreographer on the show too. he choreographed this zombie group dance.

another wade robson's fantastic choreography. but there's no ivan. ): top4.

more group dances.
top20. its so freaky how whoever choreographed this dance correctly predicted the top4! they are left standing in the middle at the end. /:

top18

top14

top6, aka eyeliner dance. jed! i got you watching. (:

notice these are GROUP DANCES, nothing to do with ivan. (: if you haven't figured it out yet, my youtube was down for awhile, and now that its up again, i'm on a rampage. /:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

i cannot get enough of him. sigh.

i guess its going to be another day spent at home. i woke up with half a mouthful of blood, thankfully. so it means my wound or "operation site" as they call it has stopped bleeding. i'm supposed to be on soft diets for the rest of today too so who knows what i was thinking when i agreed to go for sushi lunch with jaclyn. its sticky. /:

hmm. i've been pretty high on painkillers so don't kill me if i say weird stuffs. i woke up to find my entire left cheek swollen, when i went in to wash up, and stupidly stuck my freaking toothbrush into my mouth, causing me to wince in excruciating pain. okay, i'm exaggerating, but it hurts alright.

ahma's porridge was the best. i haven't had it since jamie and i were spending our time at ahma's place! mmm, i missed it. i was practically cleaning out the bowl, shoved the last spoon of it into my mouth when i tasted..salted egg yolk. bleaugh. i hate egg yolk, chicken egg yolk, salted egg yolk, and the worst of the worst, century egg yolk. ugh!

danyeow and i always find the weirdest things to talk about, when we actually do talk. its like the last time we were talking about how tv earn money, making absurd assumptions and such. today, today we argued about fiction vs non-fiction books. i'm pretty sure many would stand on my side of fiction. (: but daniel did point out certain pretty interesting non-fiction worldy aspects.

ahh, the wonders of randomness. (:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

hafiz and his model manequinn. haha.


jaclyn's cam has a little problem. /:

it's kind of the best group shot. /:


okay. i'm in a bad mood, due to pain. don't mind me. so you want to be that person, go ahead. i'm not going to stop you. but don't go acting nice and then ignore the person. okay, maybe its just showing the jackass you really are. i should have known earlier damnit.

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

it hurts, like freaking crap

my cheek has started to swell too. painkillers are making me so sleepy, but my naps have been so short, so many, but so short. i can feel the pain, and i always wake up with a mouthful of blood. /:

ivan on tv is definitely taking my mind off the pain, i'm glad he got so far into the competition so i'll still get to see him next week. (: ivan's still as cute although everything on tv is green. in mia's words, he's a dude, he's raw, he's vulnerable, its just...i love you. aww. that's exactly my feelings too.

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

thankyou, samantha, for everything! (:

had the operation today. it didn't actually hurt during the procedure itself, but the doctor said it will hurt later on in the day and may still hurt for the next few days!! gosh. it was quite scary, actually, watching them prepare the equipment, then have them cover you from head to toe, leaving only my mouth and chin exposed. then they blindfolded me. there were two assistants, of which one is a trainee. that kind of freaked me out a little. /:

i could hear everything that was going on. the slicing of my gum, the blood coming out, the suction, the scratching noises, and i think it was a little spinning saw thing the doctor used. he kept pushing the tooth so hard my head moved, then he had to stop and shift my head into position, and i was told not to move myself. i didn't feel any pain or the tooth coming out though. i only realised i was drinking damn alot of blood.

i have to bite on gauze for the next few hours. dropped by sam's place earlier to collect my cd. sorry i couldn't talk properly. /: i've been given strict instructions to stay at home the rest of today, so don't be surprised if i end up posting alot. and maybe some more vids and pics. (:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

haha, i love the part after tyce said "they just need to bring out the maturity, and i know they will".

my elbows have slight abrasions from where i've been lying on my stomach on the sofa. this tells me i've been spending way too much time on the sofa. /: definitely not a good thing. i'm going for that dumb wisdom tooth operation tomorrow. and the doctor just absolutely couldn't keep himself from telling me that it was an operation procedure, not an extraction.

so i'm going to lie in bed tonight and have that darn sentence play itself over and over in my head. causing me to not be able to sleep. but then again, if i don't sleep, i'd probably be in too much pain to sleep tomorrow night as well. (thanks, daddy, for telling me that.) urrghh, i've never even done anything to my teeth before except for braces and cavities. and i thought those hurt.

how am i going to handle an operation?? my wisdom teeth haven't even showed yet. so i've yet to gain that "wisdom" and they're going to take that away from me? well according to the doctor my wisdom teeth will never come out as they are blocked by the last molars, and if i allow them to continue to grow they will start to hurt like crap. this leaves me with virtually no choice right?

screams!

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

haha guess who did this for me. not well done, but cute! (:

oh and i found out ivan's april has kids. i know she has a 7year old girl. she must have been 14/15 when she delivered then! gosh.

something done out of boredom:
Start at 100 and take away 1% or each of these you have done in the past or are doing right now. When complete put your total in the subject box and repost in a new post. Have fun and be completely honest. I was.

Smoked.
Drank alcohol.
Cried when someone died.
Been drunk.
Had sex.
Been to a concert.
Given a handjob/gotten a handjob.
Given a blowjob/gotten a blowjob.
Been verbally sexually harassed.
Verbally sexually harassed somebody.
Felt someone up and/or been felt up.
Laughed so hard something came out of your nose.
Cheated on a boyfriend/girlfriend before.
Been cheated on by a boyfriend/girlfriend.
Been to prom.
Cried at school.
Gotten lost in a WalMart or a department store.
Went streaking.
Given a lap dance.
Had someone of the opposite sex in your room.
Had someone of the opposite sex sleep over.
Slept over at someone of the opposite sex's house.
Kissed a stranger.
Hugged a stranger.
Went scuba diving.
Driven a car.
Gotten an xray.
Hit by a car.
Had a party.
Done drugs.
Played strip poker.
Got paid to strip for someone.
Ran away from home.
Broken a bone.
Eaten sushi.
Bought porn.
Watched porn.
Made porn.
Had a crush on someone of the same sex.
Been in love.
Frenched kissed.
Laughed so hard you cried.
Cried yourself to sleep.
Laughed yourself to sleep.
Stabbed yourself.
Shot a gun.
Trash talked someone and then acted like their best friend the next day.
Watched TV for 9 consecutive hours.
Been online for 9 consecutive hours.
Watched an animal die.
Watched a person die.
Had sex and/or messed around somewhere with atleast 1 person present.
Pranked somebody.
Put somebody in the hospital.
Snuck into someone's room and/or your own room after being out.
Kissed somebody of the same sex.
Dressed punk.
Dressed goth.
Dressed preppy.
Been to a motocross race.
Avoided somebody.
Been stalked.
Stalked someone.
Met a celebrity.
Played an instrument.
Ridden a horse.
Cut yourself.
Bungee jumped.
Ding dong ditched somebody.
Been to a wild party.
Got caught stealing something.
Kicked a guy in the balls.
Stolen a boyfriend/girlfriend from a friend.
Went out with your friend's crush.
Got arrested.
Been pregnant.
Babysat.
Been to another country.
Started your house on fire.
Had an encounter with a ghost.
Donated your hair to cancer patients.
Been asked out by someone that you never though you'd to be asked out by.
Cried over a member of the opposite sex.
Had a boyfriend/girlfriend for over 3 months.
Sat on your ass all day.
Ate a whole carton of ice cream all by yourself.
Had a job.
Gotten cut from a sports team.
Been called a whore.
Danced like a whore.
Been mistaken for a celebrity.
Been in a car accident.
Been told you have beautiful eyes.
Been told you have beautiful hair.
Raped somebody.
Been raped.
Danced in the rain.
Been rejected.
Walked out of a restaurant without paying.
Punched someone/slapped someone in the face.

now reply and put your %
69% should i be proud of myself? it doesn't say what the score means. i shall assume its good. (:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

its too weird, how a casual comment can turn into an argument, or in my case, a lecture. ok, so maybe it wasn't so casual. yes, i was complaining. and dad, if you're reading this, i'm sorry. sam, thankyou for everything despite having your own thingies at the moment. by the way, i left mengyih's photo cd in your bag. sorry.

i was sharing earlier that i want things to be like before. i don't know when it started and i don't know how. all i know is that i need Him, badly. see how my life has gone downhill since that period of time. in my family, the relationships have gotten better but gone were the days of hugging and kissing each other goodnight. academically, i've fallen really far down, and it may be too late to make a comeback. i wish that all the bullshit would go away.

i don't have the confidence to do anything anymore. i can't even get myself to pray with a group. i'm afraid it'll come out all...fake. i don't want it to be that way. i've been putting on the act for too long. its hurting. i used to be able to dive headfirst into anything i set my eyes upon. where has that girl gone? the girl in the mirror stares back with lifeless eyes, the hint of desperation growing, the hate she bears weighing down on her.

this is not depression, merely a moment of emo-shit. bear with it.

and i still wish so much that i was in april's shoes.

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

daddy, if you're readin this, don't go any further down than this post. please. or just skip the ivan post.

its been a pretty fun two days for me. out with jaclyn, joshua, fuad, fiq and hafiz yesterday. bugis street has loads of nice stuff. it reminds both joshua and me of vietnam! see, we think alike. (: i want another manicure. ohwells. i realised you can't do much when there are guys around. you feel more self-concious, for some reason. its weird.

breakfast with sam this morning. definitely the highlight of my day. got to catch up with her after awhile. we had quite alot to talk about, i suppose you can say. but what to do? whe's my busy woman what. so if she's not busy, it'll mean she's not living up to the nickname right? (;

i have absolutely no idea what jed was trying to tell me, but ivan made people laugh. (: that makes me happy. the video. it made people laugh!

i'm dreaming i was in april's shoes.

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

it is impossible to put down in words, how much i love ivan!
but then, the weirdest thing just happened. i mean doing the research on my favourite celebs is my favourite past time. people know i can spend hours at a time on it, just like tonight, or rather, this morning. but i've never felt jealous before. not ever, until now.

i was just talking to jed about the jealousy thing the other day. and now... well translation of all this i'm babbling about--i found ivan's girlfriend's blog. i knew he had a girlfriend. i knew she was called april. what i didn't know, is that she's 2-3 years older than him. which is really weird, considering he's young, and they've been together for quite some time. but what i didn't realise, was that ivan was her boyfriend. in other words, she is the source of ivan's encouragement. she is the one that keeps him going. she is the one he comes home to everytime he's done touring.

its not fair, i was just telling fiq, that she gets to treat him like a normal person. she's falling head over heels for him, and what seperates her from his fans, is that he's going gaga over her too. i mean, when you find the blog of your celeb crush's girlfriend, you're expecting to read about how hard she has to fight to keep him (in your dreams). somehow, i didn't expect to find this:

she was with him before he became famous. she treats him like how we at the other end of the world would treat our own boyfriends. she has the nerve to get pissed with him. in the hollywood world, its hard to believe that this still exsist.

see that green monster? i've watched videos of them at parties, just having everyday fun, just sitting with a group of friends in front of the tv, just doing silly stuff, just talking. just. i know i'm talking nonsense, but its not nonsense in my head. i just have no idea how to put all of it in words. i'm done complaining though, i suppose. for i found one particular silly video that not only cheered me up, but caused me to laugh until i got an ache in my side.

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

new song of the moment! (:
its from charlotte's web.

song of last moment:
just so you know; jesse mccartney

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

new year's eve/ new year's day;

this has nothing to do with me!

group photo. (:

watching magic.

look at the delight on jaclyn's face.

3.5 of clubs! (:

the ball trick was really cute!

berry was on kimberly's lap! and jaclyn, see when drink you may feel bu shu fu.

fireworks!((:

look! its raining stars!

they were spectacular, but i couldn't capture nice pics. ):

me; kimberly; jaclyn

thankyou, mr stranger, for taking this for us during the high-ness or the new year atmosphere. (:

with the mask.

berry! and the hair! the hair. haha. the hair.



before i left them. look how drunk jaclyn was.(:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

escape with red camp people;

see the people behind us falling asleep queueing.

the girl at escape. (:

we need a moment, thankyou!

fuad; me; jaclyn

three of the red camp leaders.

the cam had a little problem there.

we broke daddy's no rides rule.

the four black wet bums riding the train home.(:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me

shopping with jaclyn;

spageddies for dinner with the family.

with the twitty stiltwalker.

in the tiny mirror. at missha i think.

look at that sexy bod.


matching tatoos.

lampost.


we saw a cute eeyore!(:

and a cute baby!

i just took a pink one off the shelf to match jaclyn's big, girly eyes.

we ended up in the toilet.

and taking

the most retarded

pictures ever. /:

even up to the extent of taking with a random angmoh lady.

reflections. damn that dude. spoil the picture.

yes, jaclyn, i love you too. (:

♥ Do what you do,
down on me